A Mother’s Day Conversation That Matters
That might sound heavy for a holiday, but it doesn’t have to be. It’s not prying—understanding what issues your mom may be facing can help you know how to best help her. Plus, learning more about her health history can help you know more about what risks you might face as you get older. These conversations, when approached with love and curiosity, can be empowering—not only for your mom, but for your whole family. After all, what better way to show your appreciation than by supporting her well-being and peace of mind?
Instead of diving straight into difficult topics, begin by asking how she’s feeling these days. How are her energy levels? Is she enjoying her regular activities? Has she had a recent check-up? These light questions can naturally lead into a deeper discussion about any health challenges or future care preferences—without feeling too serious or overwhelming.
You might be surprised at how much she’s already thought about—or how much she’s been waiting for someone to ask.
If you’ve been thinking about your own health goals, experiences with caregiving, or even stories about friends planning for the future, share them! Framing the conversation as a shared journey—something you’re both navigating together—can make it feel more like teamwork than a to-do list.
For example, you might say: “I’ve been thinking about what I want my own care to look like when I get older, and it made me wonder about your thoughts on that, too.” This kind of approach opens the door for honesty, humor, and connection.
Talk to your mom about her wants and needs
It’s not all about logistics. Ask about the life she wants to lead as she gets older. Does she want to stay in her home for as long as possible? Would she enjoy living somewhere with more social opportunities and less household upkeep? What brings her joy and what might help her stay independent longer?
From there, it becomes easier to explore practical matters—things like long-term care insurance, advanced care directives, or estate planning—as tools that support her goals.
You don’t have to cover everything in one sitting. In fact, you probably shouldn’t. But the most important thing is to start the conversation. Once you’ve had that initial heart-to-heart, it’ll be easier to return to the topic as needs or circumstances change.
Mother’s Day is a wonderful time to begin this conversation—not because it’s about hard questions, but because it’s about love, appreciation, and looking ahead together.
Because what mom really wants (besides brunch) is to know that her voice matters, her wishes are respected, and that her family is walking alongside her every step of the way.